The Great Masturbator By Manny Grimaldi

 

I am the very model of a modern major radio star.

I’ve information. I am a Pooh Bear. I puff Gauloises

and my poesies are on demand 

with a much venerated mustache to boot.

I topple high society reaching dizzying Olympus Mons.

I think I bring war’s hammer to the world 

with every word from my silky, sensual honeyed lips,

my slips and heels and lipstick too.

But my tease does not serve you.

I could stand atop a bar waving my hairy hips

over your bourbon and Coors Light,

and flavor your beverage with such delight—

that you’d reject me.

Instead I cling to a stripper’s pole, descend,

whirring a hole to China where the rice is warm,

and the birds are cold.

They will watch me make changes divine.

I am rose of May. I am MacBeth. I am most anyone

to impress.

Strip this artifice what do you find?

Leave with your questions, close the curtains, 

none of this is mine.

manny grimaldi is a kentucky poet and editor now celebrating the release of his first poetry book RIDING SHOTGUN WITH THE MOTHMAN, available on Amazon.  he is managing editor at YEARLING poetry journal in its 4th year of publication.  he lives in an uncharted area of the ghetto with two insane birds named PETEY and CORNPOP that wake at 4:45 a.m. and sing melodiously to the tunes of LANA DEL REY and MY MORNING JACKET.  the dishes are never done. 

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0DKTWLSRC?fbclid=IwY2xjawGPRA5leHRuA2FlbQIxMQABHcf-x-cUZ4xHOV2unFF1WiP86QwsPuAIaVq5Gt9fLmClIwVjHEcABBUOzg_aem_9jC1PS6hGVynKZdM6ruz6Q

Last In Line By Daniel S. Irwin

Yeah, ain't nuttin' new.

I always been kinda slow.

Now here I am, again,

Just last in line as usual.

My daddy always said

That I needed to get

My lazy ass in gear.

Weird situation here.

All us dudes lined up

Total butt ass naked.

It seems to kinda creep

Along but with these

Hot babes movin' up

And down the row,

Big tits and sweet ass

Rubbin' up against us,

Every one of us bozos

Got rock hard salamis.

This ain't so bad, but

I could use some relief.

Okay, finally, I'm next up

After this guy in front of

Me. What the heck is

That choppin' sound?

Satan with a meat clever

And..! Whoa, Nelly! How

Do I get outta this line?

Daniel S. Irwin, native of Southern Illinois (such as it is).  Artist, writer, actor, soldier, scholar, priest among other things.

Work published in over one hundred magazines and journals worldwide.  Has appeared in over one hundred films. 

Speaks fluent gibberish when loaded.  Not much into blowing his own horn as you are only as good as your latest endeavor.

Once turned to religion but Jesus just walked away.